Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
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Wednesday, December 29, 2004dear diary,today was sure 1 memorable day. kind of like the last gathering for the 4 musketeers(cin, cheryl, mei yi and me). this was our last gathering before we go seperate ways. honestly, 4 years seem to have just flashed across, and all the good and bad times spent together all appear so insufficient. the day started out where we had to meet at 11 at tampines mrt. i arrived first followed by cindy. she was wearing this awfully big shirt, and since we were planning to head towards the esplanade, we decided she should go get a new top, and we did. oh, but before that, we met up with a few friends, first calista, then our singma friend. okay, so then we headed for "this fashion". we were joined by mei yi shortly then finally by our dear cheryl. and after much searching and trying on of clothes(by cin), we finally settled on a blue blouse. :) following, we headed for tampines mall, and decided to watch kung fu hustle, cheryk made a fool out of herself in front of the ticket counter guy whilst cindy worked her charms. why i said that? oh cause we found ourselves placed in really comfortable seats. ;) and that's all thanks to cin's little maigc. hehe. okay, the movie wasn't too bad though i felt there wasn't that much depth but it was after all a good way to lighten the mood. really funny, and it was the first time i heard cin laugh so loud. ;) oh, i forgot, we saw caroline too! yup. and before the movie, we headed for the food court for lunch, which i skipped. figure i'd been eating too much and missing a meal won't hurt. so okay, what we did after the movie? we went straight for the mrt. and towards esplanade we go! we went up to the roof-top terrace. and man, was that place beautiful. many loving couples too in fact. so from there all we did was talk and talk and did we have much to talk about. we talked about how naive we are in the real world out there. how we must protect ourselves. we talked about guys, about not wanting to get involved in BGR. about who would found a boyfriend first. about how vicious some girls can get etc etc. i'm really reluctant to move on. i want to stay at where i am now. i may be a little slow, little blur but at least i'm safe. i don't feel ready to face the real world. :( and good times pass quickly. soon it was 6.30 and all of us wanted to catch the 7p.m channel u show so home we headed. man, that talk felt great. oh and we all settled on meeting every 3 months. and i was to be the organizer. how uninteresting, but for everyone's sake, i'm willing to make the ultimate sacrifice, of what i don't know. :) okay, so that's all for our meaningful outing. and the promise to keep in contact can only depend on whether we're willing to put in that extra effort to keep in touch. but for now, may we always remain friends forever. P.S. deepest condolenses to the people who lost their lives to the waves and earthquake. and deepest sympathy to their loved ones. if anyone has anything of which these victims may need please bring them to marine parade family service center at blk 53, Marine terrace, #01-277, before friday. thank you. Saturday, December 25, 2004mErRy cHrIsTmAs everybody!!! hiash... so fast and another year has quickly passed us. this has gotta be my most memorable year ever... including 2003 of course. so many life lessons learnt. so many changes made. such drastic emotional moments. sheesh, getting quite cranky aren't I?anyway if anyone called me from yesterday, sorry, i stayed over at my uncle's last night. in fact my whole family did. left my house at about 1.15 yesterday afternoon and was picked up by my uncle and we headed for his house, picking up a few stuff on the way. went there, watched "pao ba hai zi", but erm, actually i was skiving, i was suppose to be doing erm, sushi. you could say i had a fantabulous dinner last night. there were a wide variety of food, ranging from chinese food to malay food to jap food. and boy were they delicious. :) helped a BIT with the cooking, but erm, as we all know my mouth was the most hard-working. ;) hehe, okay so later that night, we opened a few presents at my uncle's place, duh they were from my uncle. and we proceeded up to my grands which was just up the hill. oh i forgot, my uncle and grandparents live on a hill, the same hill, but one at the peak and the other at the bottom. so ya, not very long walk lar, oh ya! i missed a part. before opening the presents right, we went over to my erm grandaunt's place where there was another gathering up there. we sent some food over and i got praised as we all know... *kidding kidding*. my aunt and grandaunt claimed i could join miss singapore. what a joke, thank goodness i could act, or else i would have rolled on the floor laughing. okay so basically my presents were bags, a set of towels and ya, about all lar. not many but cool. had a few surprises yesterday, recieved a few smses, i was pretty taken aback by mei yi's 1, cause i thought she was still in shanghi, but obviously not, she came back on the 22nd! ooh at later that night, i recieved 1 from my koala bear, and i erm, thought she found her phone. but i sort of forgot that the same line could be retrieved back... sheesh. silly right... okay anyway my hands are aching, just finished watching a cinderalla story. not bad a movie. quite a few sad parts cause i erm, nearly cried... hehe.. okay MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone. take care... *P.S: some kind soul's gotta help me out. as u all know i haven't been in relationships before so i have no idea what the tell tale signs of someone liking you is, not that i'm saying someone likes me or anything, but i think i'm giving pple the wrong ideas? ya, okay anyway if anyone actually reads this and is willing to help, give me a call ya... thanks! *muacks* Thursday, December 23, 2004well duh everyone knows everyone else's entry would have something to do with christman but i just couldn't think of a better title.. ;) so anyway here's wishing everybody a merry merry christmas!!! it's gonna be a new year once again, i wish everyone the best of luck in the next year and may all your wishes and dreams come true... may we always keep in touch and be in the company of each other forever and ever... :)oh ya, to my poor koala bear, don't be too upset at the lost of your phone k, maybe it's a sign from God to let the old things go and welcome new stuff... lame i know but that's the best i can think of... hehe... okay so today i went out.. well i should say the process of where i walked and all but erm, too lazy to do that... hm... maybe my new year resolution is to be less lazy, though i reckon that must have been my resolution for 2004... hm... oh! i''m out of point... *grins* alright, back to the topic, i was actually approached by this young guy, a teenager for donation outside the "guan yin miao", a temple around bugis area, also known as "si ma lu", and i erm... was really mean and all, and although he's never gonna read this but still i think i owe him an apology.. sorry! hope you didn't take it to heart. :) alright, it's the christmas season. everyone's feeling happy etc. and i guess i'll leave everyone with this christmas song i like... merry christmas everyone! My only wish(this year) by Britney Spears Last night I took a walk in the snow Couples holding hands, places to go Seems like everyone but me is in love Santa can you hear me I signed my letter that's sealed with a kiss I sent it off, and just said this I know exactly what I want this year Santa can you hear me I want my baby, baby I want someone to love me And someone to hold Maybe, maybe (maybe, maybe) I'll be on my own and I'll be thankful Santa can you hear me? I have been so good this year And all I want is one thing Tell me my true love is here He's all I want, just for me Underneath my Christmas tree I'll be waiting here Santa that's my only wish this year Christmas Eve, I just can't sleep Would I be wrong, for taking a peek? 'Cause I heard that you're comin' to town Santa can you hear me I really hope that you're on your way With something special for me in your sleigh Oh please make my wish come true Santa can you hear me I want my baby, baby I want someone to love me And someone to hold Maybe, maybe (maybe, maybe) We'll be all alone under the mistletoe I want my baby, baby I want someone to love me And someone to hold Maybe, maybe (maybe, maybe) I'll be on my own and I'll be thankful Santa can you hear me? I have been so good this year And all I want is one thing Tell me my true love is here He's all I want, just for me Underneath my Christmas tree I'll be waiting here Santa that's my only wish this year I hope my letter reaches you in time Bring me a love, I can call all mine 'Cause I have been so good this year Happy alone, under the mistletoe He's all I want and I'll be thankful Santa can you hear me? I have been so good this year And all I want is one thing Tell me my true love is here He's all I want, just for me Underneath my Christmas tree I'll be waiting here Santa that's my only wish this year (Oh Santa, can you hear me?) He's all I want, just for me Underneath my Christmas tree I'll be waiting here Santa that's my only wish this year Santa that's my only wish this year Monday, December 20, 2004*excited* oh man oh man, this morning was real interesting. my family and i had studio photo taking!!! you know the kinds where they have all sorts of backgrounds, and ya, "furniture" which is camouflaged. and u have all sorts of poses... you know that kind? yup yup, i had that this morning! okay okay let me start with the mad morning.our family got up at about 8.30, went down for breakfast. cam up at about 9.30. i bathed first. i took pretty long a guess, hehe, then had to go pick clothes for my sis whose a loser at choosing clothes. so ya, got this brown top and long skirt, which i thought matched really nicely but erm, it ddn't match her cause of her ultra dark skin. okay, so we had to do make-up and i thought my mum would do it for me, but i was wrong, in the end i had to do it myself and everyone knows i suck of putting make up but anyway i just did it. i started with the eye brows and goodness i nearly cried cause i thought it looked horrendous, but heck, no time, it was already 10.15 and we had to leave the house by 10.30 and we've yet to pack the stuff properly, so ya, so i rushed through my eye shadow etc etc. and finally at about 10.50, we erm, hopped into the car. ;) okay and you know what's the best part. i had my grad night top on, together with shorts. and the place we were heading for the photo shoot was in the city(ue square building). ya. so i carried my skirt in hope of covering up my shorts, and erm, ya everyone would have guessed i failed. oh and when we got there, the shop wasn't even opened!!! urgh. so we waited outside and finally a man opened the door! hehe. went in, got changed, helped my sis with her hair. and ya the photo shoot! first was the family formal shots. took about 4 of them. then change pose. took about another 3 shots. then its the mummy and me and my sis! then my mum and bro and the list goes on. oh and you know the funniest parts were the parts where my siblings and i had to take single shots and heaven knows we suck at posing. so my bro was up first. not to well done, my sis was worse. she was super stiff. okay and mine was the "best". the photographer took a white chair covered a portion of it in sheep skin and ya did a few poses for me to follow. i could have died laughing then... hehe. :) okay and so i tried following. it wasn't too bad, but soon i erm, ran out of poses. so he gave me more ideas and i think i took the most single shots. oh well... what to do, i was charming... keke. kidding kidding. ya anyway can't wait for the album to be out. pple, must come over to my house and see the album okay? hehe.... *excited* shall go now... take care all! oh and early merry christmas!!! Friday, December 17, 2004okay, i'm honestly stuck. oh before i continue, if anyone's interested, i got into srjc(serangoon) for first 3 months. i was kinda astounded by the results cause sr was kinda like my 5th choice so ya... anyway fortuntely i won't be the only one cause i found 3 other of my classmates going there too! but then again, i'm kidna upset by where i got posted to, not because i think it's a bad jc or anything but it just wasn't my choice, but hey, who knows i might like it, though the journeys gonna be a killer...oh and i just found out today cindy might be in singapore the whole time!!!! *grinz* but at the expense that she's sick so not that good lar... anyway can't waith for mei yi to come back and then we can go out 1 last time before our next part of our life journey starts, the thought of that really makes me shudder. i mean time really seems to fly so quickly and now, i realise that what i had hold on so tightly before really doesn't hurt me anymore. good eh? in fact the feeling and realization of finally letting go feels amazing. :) i wish the people around me could feel this wonderful feeling too. i honestly dread 2005. i so want to stay where i am right now. the only time for me to slack. though i'm pretty sure i lost quite some brain cells just by slacking but haiya... it's a wonderful time to just relax... ;) okay, not much to say, just that i really miss my classmates and friends that i won't be seeing often when 2005 comes... x.x Tuesday, December 14, 2004oh gosh, i can't exclaim how happy i am. i tell you, i wish i was at a beach right now, screaming with my hands above my heads. that's how happy i am. first let me proudly announce, SAC CAME IN 3RD FOR THE ZONAL FIRST AID AND NURSING COMPETITION!!! hooray!!!i couldn't believe my ears when i heard the news okay, honestly, i was in total disbelieve, i mean after all they've done, coming in the top 3 seemed impossible. but then , they did it!!! and our dear AMANDA LIM came back with the BEST LEADER AWARD!!! how cool is that? oh man, the glory of finally winning something back is so overwhleming, but i sure hope this award didn't make my sec 3s complacent cause they have serious improvements to be made. yup. as for the sec 2s, it's alright you didn't win this year, there's always next year and next year, you'll go for the competition with superb skills. :) okay, this is ONE reason why i'm happy. why i'm happy reason 2: that sunday night, along with my belongings, i went over to my nanny's place for a short stay, mainly for a visit actually. And the next day was monday so my "sister"(my nanny's daughter) brought me and my "mummy"(my nanny) shopping! we took bus service 63(i think) to Parco bugis junction. the first store i remember entering was Espirit. got a t-shirt which costs $29.90, blue in colour. i wanted to protest but too late, ya. imagine, $29.90 for a shirt, would you bear to spend that sum on a shirt, i personally wouldn't but anyway since it's a gift from them, it's deeply appreciated from my heart. so we continued shopping, walked into some shop and i got a great deal. i bought 40 christmas cards at only $12.50 i think. that price was quite reasonable i felt. okay and the last piece of thing i bought for that day was a denim skirt from SEIYU. i like the skirt a lot. :) later that evening, i met up with my "dad"(my nanny's husband) and we proceeded to "Excelsior Hotel" but sadly the restaurant was holding a wedding dinner. i'm just jinxed right... :( but anyway, in the end, we headed towards suntec and had steambaot beffet. not bad a taste you know. they had cakes, ice cream w etc etc. but it soon proved to be too much for little me to absorb. i was so full i wanted to sit on that chair forever. oh and i so totally embarressed myself cause i dropped their procelein spoon which broe. haish. and then when i took a metal fork, it too dropped and i became a laughing stock. sad right. okay but anyway i was made happy by the food. :) and now for this morning, had bread in the morning and my aunt suggested tim sum for lunch, and coincidentally the tim sum stall wasn't open, and my aunt said they don't close on tues so now i'm even more sure i'm jinxed. haish. so me and my "sis" ended up eating fish slice soup. yup. not too bad lar. :) then at around 2.30, my parents picked me up form this nanny's place bringing along my photo album for my "mummy" to pick a photo of me during grad night. and they all praised me saying i looked pretty and also i'm too skinny(which is utter rubbish) but ya. soon, my family and i were on our way to play badminton. we had made an appointment with my mum's friends and their kids to have a game of badminton. beside our court were a group of youngsters who seriously looked older than me, especially one guy(which was the only 1 i saw in a sea of girls). okay and i don't know how but my dad had a challenge with him and my dad lost. :( totally unexpected but haiya, what to do, my dad old ready and besides he never did recieve any professional training. okay so some parts of the game i heard my name, well not exactly my name but "your daughter this, your daughter that..." you know.. so ya, i wasn't too pleased. oh... but i had the last laugh when i foudn out how old he was. guess? he's only sec 2!!! next year sec 3. he couldn't believe it when i told him i've already completed my sec 4. and ya, i couldn't believe either that he was my sister's age! hehe. kinda wierd but ya, the part that turned my off was when he asked which school i was from and duh i said "SAC" and he immediately turned around cause why, he's from VS. sheesh. proud people. i remember li-anne saying all VS guys are b******s, i hope this one proves me wrong though i kinda got turned off by his boastful nature, but i guess it's just the "face" problem eh. oh and i truly admire my dad for his good sportsmenship. you go dad! ah well, really exhausted after all that work out. shall go now, shall update soon. ciao! Tuesday, December 07, 2004I’m elated!!! Know why know why? Okay, I’m going to tell you all about it! Hehe…Okay let me start with yesterday. Yesterday morning, at about 11 I went to school to help with my cca, and man was I disappointed. Well in fact actually more of worried cause I mean my com team people aren’t really ready at all. 3 out of 5 of the sec 2 com team weren’t around and it was already the last third training! sigh, but then again. I ought to have faith in them right, so ya, if any of you all are reading this, I have faith that you’ll do SAC proud and just do your best! =) Okay done for the morning, now the afternoon, so at about 1.30 we(me, mei yi and cindy) left the school, initially I told Cheryl to meet us at 1.15 at tampines mrt but obviously we were late, in fact, a full 1 hour lat. Why? Cause mei yi had to return her books, so in fact we made a huge detour but anyway Cheryl wasn’t that pissed, I mean at least she didn’t walk out on us, so she’s wonderful… =) okay and as everyone knows, I can be somewhat blur at times, so I thought century square had a “jack’s place” and goodness I was wrong… haish, so we took a train over to simei and settled there. By the time we got our food it was already 3. and ya, we all kinda enjoyed our food except for Cheryl I suppose. Me and cin had the same thing(pepper fish and pasta, I think) whilst mei yi had hamburger steak and fries, and Cheryl changd her order of chicken cutlet and fries to some mushroom rice I think… she thought of it as awful but I found it quite appetizing. Ah well, difference in likings ya… hm… oh, I forgot to add, before our main course, we had soup and after the main course we had ICE-CREAM!!! Yum yum… it was delicious. Okay honestly after the whole meal I was so full I could hardly walk. Sheesh. Imagine the fats… urgh. So after we were all done it was already like nearing 4 and cindy had to rush of for her ballet. So we said “bye” and headed for the ladies of which we then walked around east point. Actually we had wanted to bring mei yi to her all time favourite place, the esplanade but then we decided it was too late so we just toured around east point. =) okay and soon it was time for us to disperse. Oh and mei yi told us all about the story of the princess and the piper and now I want to watch that movie (played by the Barbie dolls in fact) =) okay and home it was. Now for today!!! I went out with my unswornie swornie sister today!!! We were out to scout for a totally matching, no in fact the exact same clothes to wear… keke. So we met and headed for orchard. Stopped by at somerset, went to OG cause cindy said there was a sale there, and she bought a perfume, not too bad a smell. Yup and then we continued to walk. Entered the heeren to find that most shops have yet to be opened. Found nothing to out favour and so we continued walking. Walk walk walk walk, then we went over to some shop and entered the “This Fashion”, tried on some stuff but they either matched only me or cindy. So we decided to walk out and ya, it was already 2+ and ya we were getting kinda desperate cause I had to get home by 5. So we thought of going to parkway and ya the only plausible route was to take mrt all the way back to bedok and then take 31 or 196 etc to parkway which was a total waste of time and money, so we called our friends for some help but it didn’t really work cause their suggestions had already been on our minds. Okay so in the end we walked into orchard mrt and asked the control station people and man the lady we asked was super cool. And we were told to take no. 16 from Lucky Plaza. And ya we sort of followed the directions and we ended up at far east… and… we found the “this fashion” cindy had told me about. And so we decided to give that this fashion a shot, praying so very hard that we’ll get something from there and we did!!! We got a denim dress at $30. nice nice. It was demure, sweet and fitted the both of us really nicely. Okay and so that’s why I was elated. Oh I missed a part. I kinda embarrassed myself in this fashion but haiya, why say embarrassing stuff right… =) okay and then we continued walking, and guess what happened. We were stopped by this guy who asked us if we were interested in modeling! Though I’m super sure he was staring real hard at cindy but anyway we turned him down, I mean he could have been a conman, no name card, nothing. In fact he even asked for our contacts… sheesh… okay anyway here’s the best part… we were walking in wisma when…. We turned our heads instinctively at this exit and guess what we saw standing directly in front of our eyes… LUCKY PLAZA!!! Argh!!! We were hopping mad I tell you, well actually more of laughing hysterically… cause I mean after all that walking, that silly plaza was all the time in front of us… how crappy… anyway we both brushed it off as a blessing in disguise cause I mean after all, we bought our dress… * grins *… and i just had a game of badminton not long ago, man am i exhausted. actually i wanted to go for a swim after that but i was just so drained i couldn't swim anymore... so i just sat at the chair slacking and watching my siblings swim and watch this wierd lifegurad flirt... sheesh. =) okay so I think that’s all, my fingers are aching now… yup… so happy… Friday, December 03, 2004I TRYBy: Macy Gray Games, changes and fears When will they go from here When will they stop I believe that fate has brought us here And we should be together babe But we're not I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you And I'll try to keep my cool, but I'm feelin' Chorus: I try to say goodbye and I choke Try to walk away and I stumble Though I try to hide it, it's clear My world crumbles when you are not here Goodbye and I choke I try to walk away and I stumble Though I try to hide it, it's clear My world crumbles when you are not here I may appear to be free But I'm just a prisoner of your love And I may seem all right and smile when you leave But my smiles are just a front Just a front, hey I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you And I'll try to keep my cool, but I'm feelin' Repeat Chorus: Here is my confession May I be your possession Boy, I need your touch Your love, kisses and such With all my might I try But this I can't deny, deny I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you (but I'm dreaming of you babe) And I'll keep my cool, but I'm feenin' I try to say goodbye and I choke (yeah) Try to walk away and I stumble Though I try to hide, it's clear My world crumbles when you are not near (when you are not near aahh) Goodbye and I choke (yeah, yeah, yeah) I try to walk away and I stumble (hey, hey, hey) Though I try to hide it, it's clear (say it Lord) My world crumbles when you are not here Goodbye and I choke (I'm choking) I try to walk away and I stumble Though I try to hide it, it's clear My world crumbles when you are not near (when you are not near, yeah, yeah yeah) Yeah, yeah.. okay, this song indicates what i'm feeling and thinking right now. honestly this was the most boring day i had to pass, really and i'm amazed at how i managed to pass it.. hm, wierd huh. but really i do sometimes wanna say goodbye to some people but there's something in my mind that's subconsiously not allowing me to do so. maybe it's the fear of losing someone and then regretting, i don't know. haish. i wish someone would tell me how to say goodbye. Thursday, December 02, 2004first before all other things, i'm gonna wish my fabulous dad HAPPIE BIRTHDAY!!! thanks for always cracking up jokes to lighten the atmosphere when things are solemn... :) and i admire you for being able to tolerate mum, must have taken you loads of patience... oh wanna know how we celebrated my daddy's birthday? well we actually went to the Changi Museum and ate at the cafe beside it, namely "Bark's Cafe" and the food was *smacks lips* oh so delicious... hehe... not bad lar... and ya spent the afternoon at the museum learning bout the jap occupation, man were they heartless, cruel people... urgh...okay, so i came back some time ago from my council farewell BBQ... cool eh,in fact it's the last BBQ actually... no as in the last farewell from my involvements in SAC. make sense? no right, heck... i'm suffering from super bad PMS which probably explains all the snapping at people, and ya, so sorry bout it k, if i hurt anyone... anyway i must say tonight's BBQ was really good, the food was good, yup, friendly people and really nice gifts though it was nearing the end where stuff got a little out of hand... i mean 4 of our dear people(who shall remain unnamed) decided to go for a swim, and none brought swimming costumes and so, u know what they swam in... yup... gosh i tell you i could have gotten a really bad case of swelling eyes, and they had the cheeck to hug me after that... gosh... oh and the gifts were lovely, thank you sooooo much people... *hugs* oh and i'm pure dumb, does not studying make you stupider or something cause that's what's happening to me, i mean i can stupidly press and slide my hand along a metal rule without thinking i could have been injured and so i was, injured. well, i simply had some of my skin plus a little flesh out of my middle finger... dumb rite... and then i had to go bathe so the best part was i had to do it with 1 hand... cause silly me just have this really low thrashold for pain, as in honest, i cannot stand pain, so ya... yup, i think my skin shedding is to its last bits ready, somehow the tan marks are so obvious i think i need to get a few more tank tops... uh-huh... oh, and would some kind soul tell me how i can get rid of those serious mucles aches and cramps cause i've been having them for the past few days and i can't walk properly... not good at all... oh i forgot to mention, i MAYnot be able to watch my dear juniors participate in the competition cause erm... well some music stuff going on... argh... hate that stupid lesson... anyway, shall leave now... take care all! |